I remember months ago opening a can of cranberry raspberry LaCroix and spitting it out because it was the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted. Like whole body cringing because it was so gross… I threw the whole case away because it was disgusting. Fast forward to starting Whole30… I can not get enough sparkling water. I LOVE IT! I find it interesting how your taste buds can so drastically change based on your diet, health, or simply just by aging. I think back to foods I hated as a child and young adult but can now stomach to eat.
I wanted to share my new favorite sparkling water. Purchased at Target, I LOVE Simply Balanced Cucumber Mint sparkling water. No sugar! No Sodium! Refreshing! Delicious! And the price is right. Most days I spend less than $3 for a case AND end up saving 5% using the Target App (formerly known as Cartwheel). So far every flavor of the Simply Balanced Sparkling Water I have tried, I have loved.
Best part of it being cold outside…. my multiple brands and multiple flavors of sparkling water stay ice cold in my car.
I am currently anti-Ulta. Every experience I have had at Ulta has resulted in the worst customer service ever. I always leave with a bad taste in my mouth because of something they have done. I do not know why I go back… because every time I go, I leave feeling the same. You would think I would learn my lesson. Apparently I am too stubborn to learn.
I have a problem. I am what you would call a Sephora-holic. I spend an embarrassingly amount of money at Sephora. And enjoy spending it there. Lately I have been experimenting more with lip products. I have always wanted to try those ooey gooey lip masks and picked one up while I was at Ulta. I was 100% for sure it was an Ulta brand but can not find it on their website anymore.
I did not enjoy one thing of the experience. I could not get it to stay on my lips… it was slimy… and worst of all IT BURNED!!! I hated it. And the lip scrub and lip gloss that came with it also burned. It made me so sad!!
If you have any lip product recommendations…. let me know!!!
And if I think about it… I will upload a picture of all the beautiful makeup I got for Christmas!
Being at work on Christmas has got me thinking of some pretty intense things.
“Social anxiety is characterized by a significant amount of fear in one or more social situations causing considerable distress and impaired ability to function in at least some parts of daily life. These fears can be triggered by perceived or actual scrutiny from others.
SAD is sometimes referred to as an “illness of lost opportunities” where “individuals make major life choices to accommodate their illness”. .. the main diagnostic criteria of social anxiety disorder are fear of being the focus of attention, or fear of behaving in a way that will be embarrassing or humiliating, avoidance and anxiety symptoms.”
I feel like a fraud. I hate to admit my flaws (although there are many). I like to appear as if I have everything together and that I have this positive perfect and happy life. That is not always the case. I am not kidding when I say that my social anxiety makes me angry. I use to be fearless. I use to not care if I made a fool of myself. I was secure in who I was and would go above and beyond to be active and social and in front of crowds. It kind of has come and gone in my life. I remember feeling awkward around others in high school, much as if I didn’t belong… was fairly socially adventurous in college… and as an adult kind of reverted. Now I sometimes will cry just thinking of being around people. I fear being around anyone. I very rarely feel like I belong anywhere. THIS IS NOT HOW I WANT TO BE. I want to enjoy life. I want to love myself unconditionally. I want to be fearless and secure. I am fine with my seniors. I am secure being around them, but why not in my personal life?
How do you cope with social anxiety? How do you overcome the “illness of lost opportunities”? What natural treatments do you use to overcome these feelings? I can’t just “get over it”… I have tried that. It’s not easy to talk yourself out of what your mind believes. I personally do not want to take medications, although I know they help a lot of people.
Things I am sure will help? Exercising more frequently and restarting Whole30. I truly notice a difference in how I feel on that strict Whole30 Diet.
Do you ever need a list to remember things? I sure do. I think my brain is so crowded… so I am constantly forgetting and rethinking about things I need to do… or things I need to blog about. This is my blog/journal notebook (you see, I may or may not have a little notebook for every aspect of my life!).
I opened it today to add some things I wanted to remember to blog about and noticed the top of my list was: seeing an elf as a child.
Before I get to that, I think it is only natural that after someone close to you passes away you start to think about things like ghosts and guardian angels. I do not know if I really believe in hauntings by ghosts but I for sure believe in guardian angels. And after hearing a story from my mom it just makes me believe in them even more. So how exactly does this relate to seeing an elf? I have never seen a ghost or a guardian angel…. but I swear as a child I saw an elf. I remember it in my mind so vividly.
I am about to confess that I broke the rules as a child. Sorry mom and dad!! I don’t know if it was officially Christmas or if it was still Christmas Eve. I do not even remember how old I was but I do remember it was the house on 14th Avenue where I lived until I was 8. It was one of those houses that when you walk in the front door you either walk up the stairs to one floor or down the stairs to the other. When you walked up the stairs the kitchen was straight ahead, the living room was to the left and to the right was a hall with the bedrooms. That night I was sitting at the end of the hall while everybody else was sleeping. I remember seeing the Christmas tree in all its sparkling splendor singing to me (it played music!). I wanted to see Santa for myself. My dad always got recorded proof of Santa… but I wanted to see him, the recorded proof just wasn’t enough. I do not know how long I waited but I remember at one point I looked up and saw a blur run from up the stairs into the kitchen. A few minutes later it ran the other way. I can still see the image clear as daylight in my mind (even though the figure was blurry because it moved so fast). He had a green pointy hat on, a green shirt, and green and white stripped pants with bells on his shoes. I was CONVINCED it was an elf, and I think of it often (maybe way more than I should). I think of it when people talk about seeing ghosts. Which is surprisingly alot… Although I don’t know how I feel about seeing ghosts because I never have, I will NEVER deny seeing an elf. I saw an elf when I was a child!
Photo: I think I would have been a month shy of 5 here.